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- Best moment to be on the water:
The minute before sunrise
- Best moment before going on the water:
Getting to the launch and finding out you're "first
boat".
- Best sounds on the water:
- "Fish on!"
- The splash of a surface strike.
- "It's in the net!"
- "Daddy, I caught one!"
- "Oh no, not another fish!"
- "Hey, my arms are tired, can we find some smaller fish to
catch?"
- Most valuable fly/lure:
The one swimming away, lodged in the smiling mouth!
- Four items never found in a driftboat:
- Fat-free snacks
- Hiking boots
- Just one rod
- A watch
- Five things you won't hear in a driftboat:
- "I sorta feel guilty about calling in sick."
- "We'd better go. I want to get home while it's still light
enough to cut the lawn."
- "Go ahead and cast, don't worry about hooking me."
- "I have no idea what that fish weighed."
- "It's kinda lonely out here. I hope some more boats show
up soon."
- Famous Last Words:
- "Just yank on it, it'll come out of the tree."
- "Just one more cast, then we'll go."
- "I've never had a backlash before."
- "No way is it going to rain today."
- A Good Fishing Partner:
- can cast almost as well as you
- insists on using his boat/truck
- always has extra of the hottest flies/lures
- takes a lot of breaks
- can't really "read the water"
- brings extra large lunches
- is always willing to net your fish
- lets you do all the talking(bragging)
- How can you tell if a fisherman is lying?
Look to see if his lips are moving.
- What you say after losing your first big fish:
"I had the drag set right?"
- What you say after losing your second big
fish:
"I had a great hook-set?"
- What you say after losing your third big fish:
"@#$&%!"
- What is the right time to fish?
As all good fishermen know - it's always a good time to
fish.
- A new fly rod won't change your whole life, just the part that
really matters.
- Problems may be solved while fishing, though how to catch fish
isn't always one of them.
- On a good day you'll tell your buddies the name of the hole.
- On a great day you'll tell them the name of the river.
- On the best day you'll tell them nothing(maybe a picture).
- The early bird may get the worm, but the second
mouse gets the cheese.
- Some are haunted by the fish that got away.
Others quietly plot their revenge.
- Your favorite team plays for the division
title. You fish. Your mother appears on Wheel of Fortune. You fish.
Scientists discover oil under your patio. You fish. An incredible
Euro super-model invites you to Paris for a late candlelight dinner.
You fish(early). There are those who call this silly. They'd call
it irresponsible. They wouldn't understand. That's OK. They don't
fish.
- Because it's there. Because it's more fun than mowing the lawn.
Because it's what you were born to do. Because it represents the classic
confrontation between man and beast, science and nature, intelligence
and raw animal instinct. Whatever. We really can't say for sure why
we fish. But we're pretty sure we could find some reasons.
- Something about the landscape always tells you when fish are
near...in places where water, earth and insects come together to form
ideal habitats. Streams, rivers, or lakes, classic trout waters speak
to you in a language all their own. It's these landscapes that call
you back again and again.
- In a deep channel a steelhead rests, gently finning in the river's
flow. For days, it has surged upstream, from fighting tides, to river
currents and obstacles. While watching out for predators, it's driven
forward by some force that has guided generations of steelhead homeward
from the sea. When a feathery fly swims into it's territory, it strikes.
- Fishing is like sex: The more you do it, the bigger the stories
you tell.
- Give a man a fish and you will feed him for a day. Teach a man
to fish and you can get rid of him for the weekend.
- The best time to go fishing is yesterday.
- Life is too short to fish only on weekends.
- Every hour you fish adds one hour to your life.
- Give a man a fish and you will feed him for a day. Teach a man
to fish and you can sell him fishing gear forever!
- I've spent most of my life fishing. The rest I just wasted.
- Fishing is like sex: The less you get, the more you lie.
- No matter how good you get as a fly fisherman, there’s always
a fish that’ll refuse your offerings.
- There ain’t but one time to go fishin’ and that’s “ whenever
you can.”
- Remember that the worst day of fishing, is better than the best
day at work.
- Let us imagine that Life is a River. Most people are clinging
to the bank, afraid to let go and risk being carried along by the
currents of the River. At a certain point, each person must be willing
too simply let go, and trust the River to carry them along safely.
At this point they learn to “go with the flow” and it feels wonderful.
Once they have gotten used to being in the flow of the River, they
can begin to look ahead and guide there own course onward, deciding
where the course looks best, steering there way around boulders, snags
and choosing which of the many channels and branches of the River
they prefer to follow, all the while still “ going with the flow”.
- "[Fly fishing] is the most beautiful way of trying to catch a
fish, not the most efficient, just as ballet is the most beautiful
way of moving the body between two points, not the most direct. Fly
fishing is to fishing as ballet is to walking." by
Howell Raines.
| FLY THE FRIENDLY DRIES...
|
Dry fly fishing is a lot trickier than fishing wet flies. Wet flies
are the worms of fly fishing; it frankly doesn't require a heck of a lot
of finesse to catch a trout on a wet, and you might as well hook on a
bobber. The dry fly has to land precisely right, gently simulating the
landing of the mayfly. Think of your fly as a tiny helicopter cutting
its engines to surprise the lurking Vietcong trout, but try to forget
how Vietnam turned out! Here are some dry fly hints:
- Don't try to jerk a dry fly out of your
earlobe, gently remove it with forceps hanging from your vest.
- Don't say "Here fishy, fishy, fishy".
- Although it has a mildly intoxicating aroma,
do not drink your fly floatant.
- There is no credible evidence that a dry
fly has ever been tied on a hook smaller than size #16.
- Dry fly hooks turn to lead when they meet
the water.
- Dry flies only seem to float properly when
you've spilt the contents of your fly box in the stream.
- Remember that the dry fly operates on the
as yet unproven principle that metal floats.
- Most dry flies spend most of their time
wet.
- Most fly floatants are about as buoyant
as the airplane seats that double as life preservers.
Good Luck!
| ALL I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT LIFE
I LEARNED FROM FISHING |
- There is no such thing as too much equipment.
- When in doubt, exaggerate.
- If it feels good, it’s fishing.
- Wade with caution, the unknown.
- Everyone has a story about the one that got away.
- It’s good to be at the top of the food chain.
- Even the best lines get weak after they’ve been used a few times.
- Sometimes you’ve really got to squirm to get off the hook.
- Cast everything in the best light possible.
- Keep one eye on your float at all times.
- Get reel!
- Life is a river, always changing.
- Take time to smell the fishes.
- I fish, therefore I am.
- The way to a fisherman’s heart is through his fly.
- Fish always start to grow after they get away.
- The fishing is always better at the next pool.
- Good things come to those who wade.
- When the going gets tough, the tough go fishing.
- You can’t catch them all.
- Patience is a virtue.
- Learn to, “go with the flow”.
- Big dreams = big fish = big smile.
- There are two kinds of fishermen; those that fish for sport and
those who catch something.
| IF I HAD A DOLLAR FOR EVERY
TIME... |
- I launched my boats.
- Someone said “one more cast”.
- It rained while fishing.
- Someone snagged the bottom.
- A client hooked a fish.
- Something was forgotten.
I would then be living next door to Bill Gates!
| WHY FISHIN' IS BETTER THAN
MAKING LOVE |
- Fish don’t compare you to the other fishermen; it’s not important
how long you’ve been fishing or how many others you caught.
- When fishin’ you lie about the one that got away; in lovin’
you lie about the one you caught.
- Saying “Want to see my fly / lure,” won’t get you slapped.
- When catching & releasing a fish you don’t have to lie and promise
to call and still be friends.
- Fish don’t talk.
- When you go fishin’ and you catch something, that’s good but
when you’re making love and catch something, that’s bad.
- Fish don’t care if you shower, at all.
- Your old lines still keep catching fish.
- You can catch different species in the same water, same day.
- Fish don’t like to be held.
- You don’t have to go to dinner & a movie.
- Fish don’t care if you fall asleep while you’re fishin’.
- Respect other angler's space.
- Never interrupt a lying fisherman.
- Do not litter and don't tolerate litter around you, pick it up
- Offer advice only if asked, ask only if willing to listen.
- Elitism has no place on our waters. If you really think you are
better, prove it by living up to a higher standard, not by expecting
less of others.
- Lying is still acceptable, even expected, if asked how you did or
where you were fishing. Lying about the hatch or conditions is not
as decorous, but tolerated. Lying about your residency is illegal
when purchasing a licence. Lying on the bank and taking a nap is one
of life's great joys.
- Don't think you've got it all figured out. There is always something
more to be learned.
- Always yield to anyone fighting a fish.(unless it's your buddy who's
been outfishing you all day, then everyone for themselves)
- Know your regulations-ignorance is not an excuse.
- Don't laugh at casting flubs, unless they are your own.
- Enjoy yourself, but not at the expense of someone else's enjoyment.
- Protect our environment, and respect our resources.
- Practise catch and release.
- There is never a right or wrong fly, only flies that work better
under certain conditions than others.
| ARE YOU DA MAN(FISHERMAN)?
|
- You don't use waders for winter wading.
- You don't phone girlfriend/wife when late fishing
- You buy rods for loved ones, even though they don't fish.
- You have sexy fish dreams.
- Water horroscope signs are mandatory.
- You sleep on a waterbed(no heater).
- You have fishing prints/pictures in every room(including bathroom).
- All your vacations are timed around runs and spawns.
- You drink the foam off the river.
- You have been known to eat gear fisherman's bait.
- You named your boys Sage and Loomis and your daughters Abel and
Lamson.
- You own more rods than has caught fish.
- You have unlimited credit at local tackle shop.
- You don't understand when people tell him his fly is open.
- You have a deep fascination for moon phases and weather reports.
- You fish on your days off, then phone in sick to go fishing.
- You have more boats than fingers.
- You never wear a hat(sunny or rainy).
- You have a room full of dead animals.
- You don't have family albums but fish albums.
- Your wife was cooking a turkey and sent you to the store for some
sage for the dressing, and you returned with a new fly rod!
- The dentist grinds your front teeth flat from biting line.
- "Tie me, whip me, strip me, fly me" is your motto.
- You fish because the Voices tell you to.
| 10 CLUES THAT IT'S TOO COLD
FOR YOU TO BE OUT FISHING |
- Your hooks are so brittle they shatter when hit by a fish.
- Your iced up guides on the rod remind you of the Titanic movie.
- You used your partners wicker creel to start a small bonfire
on shore for heat.
- Your partner's lips are frozen shut, which is why he hasn't reminded
you that his fishing rods which you are about to toss on the fire
are made of graphite and will give off toxic smoke.
- On the shore is a group of students conducting an experiment
on natural cryogenics.
- You're drinking anti-freeze.
- Your marine radio is working sluggishly because of icicles on
the antenna.
- When you finally get the radio to transmit, you call the marine
authorities and ask for an ice breaker to come get your stuck boat.
- You're wearing that goofy-looking ultra-insulated jacket that
your mother-in-law got you last year and you swore you'd never wear.
- You don't complain when your frostbitten fishing buddy puts his
hands in your jacket's ultra-insulated pockets.
"A fly fisherman is someone who often knows more about insects than
about fish."
I am not against golf, since I cannot but suspect
it keeps armies of the unworthy from discovering trout...
-Paul
O'Neil
Only an extraordinary person would purposely risk
being outsmarted by a creature often less than sixteen inches long,
over and over again.
-Janna
Bialek
There he stands, draped in more equipment than
a telephone lineman, trying to outwit an organism with a brain no bigger
than a breadcrumb, and getting licked in the process.
-Paul
O'Neil
The first cast carries our fly and our hope in
the world of the trout. The next move belongs to the fish.
-Roderick
Haig-Brown
 
| RODERICK HAIG-BROWN,
EXCERPTS |
" But the Steelhead, with the brightness of the sea still on him,
is livest of all the river's life. When you have made your cast for him,
you are no longer a careless observer. As you mend the cast and work your
fly well down to him through the cold water, your whole mind is with it,
picturing its drift, guiding its swing, holding it where you know he will
be. And when the shock of his take jars through to your forearms and you
lift the rod to its bend, you know that in a moment the strength of his
leaping body will shatter the water to brilliance, however dark the day."
- A River Never Sleeps
(1946)
" I still don't know why I Fish or why other men Fish, except that
we like it and it makes us think and feel. But I do know that if it were
not for the strong, quick life of Rivers, for their sparkle in the sunshine,
for the gold grayness of them under rain and the feel of them about my
legs as I set my feet hard down on sand or gravel, I should Fish less
often. A River is never quite silent; it can never, of its very nature,
be quite still; it is never quite the same from one day to the next. It
has its own life and its own beauty, and the creatures it nourishes are
alive and beautiful also. Perhaps Fishing is, for me, only an excuse to
be near Rivers. If so, I'm glad I thought of it."
- A River Never Sleeps
(1946)
" If Fishing were simply a matter of catching Fish or forming and testing
angling theories, I think I should have given it up long ago. Nor is it
simply a matter of exciting and beautiful surroundings, the splendor and
loveliness of running water and the attraction that rivers have for creatures
of all kinds, including Man. These are a large and important part of it
all, but one can enjoy them without going Fishing and I often do. I think
perhaps the lasting charm of Fishing is in the pace of the sport and in
the Fish themselves."
- Fisherman's Fall (1964)
I fish because I love to;
because I love the environs where trout are found, which are invariably
beautiful, and hate the environs where crowds of people are found, which
are invariably ugly;
because of all the television commercials, cocktail parties, and assorted
social posturing I thus escape; because, in a world where most men seem
to spend their lives doing things they hate, my fishing is at once an
endless source of delight and an act of small rebellion;
because trout do not lie or cheat and cannot be bought or bribed or impressed
by power, but respond only to quietude and humility and endless patience;
because I suspect that men are going along this way for the last time,
and I for one don't want to waste the trip;
because mercifully there are no telephones on trout waters; because only
in the woods can I find solitude without loneliness; because bourbon out
of an old tin cup always tastes better out there;
because maybe one day I will catch a mermaid;
and, finally, not because I regard fishing as being so terribly important
but because I suspect that so many of the other concerns of men are equally
unimportant - and not nearly so much fun.
- Robert Traver, 1964 (Judge John Voelker, 1903-1993)
| A RIVER NEVER STOPS CALLING!!
|
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